The Boy Who Fell
by ProcurerFaith
Summary: Ichigo is tricked into attacking and fatally injuring Hanatarou. Though Ichigo is appalled at his own crime, Hanatarou forgives him with his last breaths.


_**Disclaimer: **__I do not own Bleach. All Bleach characters are owned by Tite Kubo or their respective creators. I am making no money from this fic. It is a just-for-fun project. The only bit I own is my own characters and the way the words are put together. _he odds looked insurmountable

_**Author's Note; 5**__**th**__** July 2008**__– So much for putting up all the fics in reverse chronological order :-P Remember, edits may not quite appear as you remember them, as I'm hashing together the beta and the original uploads. I do not plan to come back and amend this work (if I start picking holes in it, I'll never stop XD)_

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_**The Boy Who Fell**_

The water obscured all sound as he sank deeper, consciousness only barely gracing his wandering mind. He watched the ripples above him as they made their blueish patterns across his vision, slowly stealing from him all light and colour. The red of his blood dispersed, becoming nothing but part of the current as he continued to sink, his arms failing him, his legs unable to move, only his heart still doing it's job.

Some deep, internal instinct produced a quiet, subdued panic, knowing that he could only survive a short time under the water. His already shocked body was frozen by the fall into the distant pool, and the water that had closed over his face had stolen what was left of his senses.

Another darker, more accepting part of the boy who continued to fall, smiled in the dim recesses of his mind.

Freedom.

Freedom was coming.

He'd always known that it was too good to be true, what he had now. Close friends, comrades, _excitement, _the terror of living the way he chose to live. In his shaded existence, he wasn't sure he'd ever _really_ lived before.

Now, Death was knocking, and like a fool he'd invited it in.

And still, the boy continued to fall.

"_Show yourself, you bastard!" Ichigo screamed, his sword at the ready. The spirit power of this one was even more powerful than that of Zaraki Kenpachi and it was causing fifteen kinds of pain in Ichigo's mind. It was all he could do to keep standing, and, worse still, the spirit energy seemed to be concentrated on him. Hanatarou and Ganju were standing well back, waiting, watching avidly; terror on Hanatarou's face, concentration on Ganju's._

_In response to Ichigo's taunt, there was little more than a laugh. Their opponent hadn't even shown himself yet, but was managing to stir Ichigo up into a frenzy. Slowly, Ichigo turned in a circle, searching for the least little sign of another presence – a glimmer in the air, a sound unidentifiable, a smell unfamiliar. Whoever this shinigami was, he knew how to manipulate, how to appear and disappear at will._

_The nearby cliff edge was altogether too close by for Ganju's comfort - sweatbeads gathered at his brow as he worried for Ichigo's safety and sanity. _

"_Ichigo-san! Ganbatte!" Hanatarou put his hands to his mouth and called, his body taut with the wish for Ichigo to be victorious. Ichigo did not respond. Instead, he called out again,_

"_How can I fight a man I can't see?! Coward! If you're not afraid to fight me, get down here, _now_!"_

_This garnered another response. The unseen foe seemed to revel in Ichigo's insults. A laugh echoed in his head._

If you used your eyes, ryoka, you'd see me. I'm here, amongst you now.

That's the boy from the fourth over there, right?

You know, the one you took as a hostage?

He doesn't look like he's protesting very much – or even making an attempt to get away.

He must be very…useful.

"_Your opponent is me." Ichigo snarled, his ire raised once again. "Leave Hanatarou out of this." In his show of concern, he opened a weak chink in his otherwise fine armour._

Ah. So _he's _Hanatarou? Seventh seat, right? You got yourself a fine, useful tool there. Everybody knocks the fourth, but truth be told, we'd all be damned without them. After all, they're very good at _healing_. But you know that already, right? He healed you after your fight with…whatshisname? Abarai? Or else how could you have fought Zaraki so soon afterwards? _The voice in Ichigo's head continued. Every word was like tiny hammers striking brain cells in his head, causing mental pain like Ichigo had never experienced before. The world swam before his eyes, and he shook his head, knowing it was vital for him to see clearly. All his senses seemed dulled though, and a cold sweat broke out on his brow._

You know, if they find him, they'll string him up. Wouldn't take much to break that neck, I'm sure.

_Shaking with indignation, Ichigo snapped,_

"_I am your opponent! Get down here and fight fair, you bastard!"_

_Once more, there was a laugh._

Oh, but fair's no fun, ryoka.

And once they've finished with him, it'll be Kuchiki Rukia's turn.

"_I will only tell you once more. _I_am your opponent. Fight me here, now. No more talking!" Ichigo cried, the pain becoming unbearable in his head. Years of being an older brother had given birth to a strong need to protect those smaller and weaker than him, and the pain and confusion, coupled with the enemy's constant jibes about Hanataro - and now Rukia - were making him very nervy._

"_Ganju!?" Ichigo yelled, and turned to look for his comrade. He had been about to instruct him to take Hanatarou and run, as he felt sure the shinigami was gunning for the smaller boy. When he glanced to where he had known Ganju and Hanatarou to be, they were missing, and in their place a man in shinigami robes stood. He had long black hair tied back at the neck, a thin face and a cruel smile._

But I am here, ryoka.

"_At last! About time you showed yourself!" grinned Ichigo,glad for the chance to finally use some of the nervous energy driving him mad. He moved towards the newcomer meaningfully, who smiled and bowed slightly. _

_Hanatarou and Ganju watched, unnerved, as Ichigo lunged towards them. At the same moment, they saw the look in Ichigo's eyes and knew what it meant. He didn't see them for what they were. Whatever hallucination he was having, he was having it on his own, and his companions could only stand and stare. Ichigo's eyes were full of spite and anger – they were not eyes he had used on either of them before. As Ichigo started to run, Ganju realized that he had no intention of stopping, or lowering his raised sword. At the last moment, Ganju grabbed Hanatarou's arm and pulled him away, causing Ichigo to pull up short beside the wall of a nearby building. He spun on his heels, staring at Hanatarou intently and matching eyes with the worried boy._

"_Bastard. You still can't fight fair, can you?"_

"_I-ichigo-san… I don't know what you mean…" Hanatarou stuttered from six feet away, looking left and right before he answered to check that there was no mistake. Ganju dared to step close enough to Ichigo to wave his hand in front of his eyes, only to find there was no reaction at all. _

"_What have you done with Ganju and Hanatarou?" Ichigo snarled._

_In his eyes, there was only one man before him, and he was an enemy._

_Once again, the shinigami's mirth-filled voice entered Ichigo's head, but this time the image of him laughed in sync._

Who, me? I haven't done anything with them. They're still right where you would expect them to be.

"_What do you mean?! Where are they?!"_

"_Hanatarou! It's not safe. We have to get back from here – Ichigo doesn't know who we are." Ganju said, a concerned scowl on his face. Hanatarou ran from Ganju's side towards Ichigo, who seemed to be undergoing a considerable internal battle of some kind._

"_But Ganju-san, Ichigo-san wouldn't hurt us! We-" Hanatarou looked back and saw Ganju's eyes drift to the space behind his head. His eyes suddenly widened, and he ran forward to grab Hanatarou. Ganju's feet seemed almost welded to the floor, he could barely make himself move. It felt as though his feet were embedded in concrete, as though he were running through treacle. In absence of any other influence, Ganju yelled,_

"_Ichigo, for fuck's sake, stop! Stop!!" Ganju yelled, his limbs still seeming too heavy for him. Suddenly it was as though the spirit energy was catching up to him. Ichigo had raised his sword once more._

"_Hanatarou, run!" Ganju yelled, knowing that his own movements were too slow, his reaction too sluggish…_

Your problem is that you spend too much time thinking about other people and not about yourself. It _will_ be the end of you.

Attack me then, ryoka. If you dare. _The shinigami smirked, turning his head. _

I'll even close my eyes for you. _He said scathingly, and did so. A flare of anger burned with renewed vigour in Ichigo and he ran forwards, feeling that he needed to move faster, that he needed to put less and less space between himself and his enemy – who seemed to not be moving. _

"_You've underestimated me, you bastard! Right from the beginning!" Ichigo screamed, running forward, holding his sword as though it was an extension of his own arms, thrusting Zangetsu forward with all his being. He felt his zanpakuto rip deep into flesh, felt blood on his hands, felt the resistance of bone and shattered it. He looked down over the handle of his sword and smiled woefully, both hands on the hilt._

_Somewhere distant, he felt sure he could hear Ganju's voice, calling – no, screaming – Hanatarou's name._

_To his alarm, he then heard the shinigami laugh once more, and say,_

Did I, ryoka. Did I really?

_Suddenly, the pressure in Ichigo's head was lifted, the tiny hammers stopped, the tingling and buzzing ended. What filled their place was a familiar voice, with unfamiliar strain._

"_Kami-sama… Ichigo…what the fuck have you done?" Ganju asked, his voice hollow. Ichigo felt a tug on Zangetsu and heard the sound of a body slowly dropping to the ground. _

_He looked up, and what he saw made him wish himself blind._

_The sword he carried, the sword he had so fiercely driven into his enemy, the sword which he had relied on so greatly – was buried almost to the hilt in Hanatarou's chest._

_For a moment, the world was still and silent – then Hanatarou choked and spat blood over Ichigo's hands._

_Horror-stricken and in agony of what he seemed to have done, Ichigo pulled the blade from Hanatarou's body, flinging it to the ground behind him. He fell to his knees, shock filling every inch of his being. His heart was in his throat, his stomach was in his boots and he felt sick. So very, very sick. _

_Hanatarou wobbled precariously, fresh blood spattering the ground before him. Ichigo dived forward and grabbed the boy around the waist and chest to stop him from falling backwards. Somehow, in all the confusion, the two boys had traversed to the cliff edge._

_For a second, Ichigo continued to hold Hanatarou still, and then drew back, letting the boy go, his blood still on his hands. _

"_No… Hana… Hanatarou…" Disbelieving, Ichigo's hands reached out for the boy's face, feeling the curves and dips of his features even as the boy's breathing became a wheeze. Ichigo was white as a hollow mask, and felt as though every drop of blood had been drawn out of him through his feet; he felt faint as he placed both hands on Hanatarou's porcelain cheeks._

"_It…It wasn't you, Hanatarou… I-it wasn't you, it was the…the shinigami… Oh, Kami-sama, on my life, it wasn't you…I wouldn't have…I'd never have hurt you…" Ichigo's breath hitched in his throat._

_The horribly injured boy's face was grey. He reached blindly for Ichigo's kimono, finding some kind of grounding in the feel of the cloth in his hands. They clasped the fabric, clinging with all their meagre strength._

"_G-gomen n-nasai… Ichigo-san…" Hanatarou forced, pausing only to cough up more blood. "I-I got in…the way…again…" Ichigo laughed bitterly, only loosely veiling the sob that rose in his throat._

"Y-you're_ sorry? W-What the Hell are _you_ s-sorry for? I'm the one who…_

"_Oh, God, Hanatarou, _I'm _sorry… I'm so sorry…"_

_Hanatarou was taken by another coughing fit. He hung from the front of Ichigo's kimono as he spat up the life blood that was quickly filling his lungs. Somehow the blow had missed his heart, but instead his lungs and other organs had taken the brunt of it. The wheezing worsened, and his breathing became little more than a series of tiny gasps. Ichigo moved, trying desperately to perform the impossible and make Hanatarou more comfortable. As he moved his knees, he felt viscid, warm dampness around the bottom of his kimono and bile rose in his throat._

"_C-can you heal yourself?" Ichigo asked hopefully, doubtful but anxious to save his companion. Hanatarou shook his head feebly._

"_No… 's too bad… No…concen…concen…tration…" he responded, his voice little more than a whisper. His hands tightened around Ichigo's lapel._

"_I…I f-forgive…" Hanatarou rasped, speaking into Ichigo's chest._

"_No! Don't you dare! Don't you dare be noble right now! Get angry with me, hate me – just don't fucking forgive me!" Ichigo forced angrily, through the tears which spilled down his cheeks. He grabbed Hanatarou's shoulders, moving one hand to stroke his cheek gently, to untangle his bloodied hair, tucking the messy strands behind his ear._

"_Ganju, quickly" –and Ganju's attention was his immediately–" get someone, anyone! Even – even if I-" Ichigo almost didn't want to say it, but "Even if I have to hand myself in, I-"_

"_N-nuh…" Hanatarou forced, letting his head fall. "No…Rukia…san…Rukia-san…tasu…kete…ku…da…sai…"_

"_No! You first! Rukia is able to wait, you're-"_

_Hanatarou pushed against Ichigo, forcing himself away from the young man. With miraculous strength, Hanatarou managed to get to his feet, almost as though his body was providing him with a last rush of adrenaline. Ichigo grabbed for him, but he stumbled back, out of his reach. He staggered towards the very edge of the cliff, and smiled crookedly. Looking back, he forced,_

"_Rukia-san…tasukete…"_

"_Hana, what are you –" But Ganju was cut short._

_Ichigo's hand just missed the boy's kimono as he fell._

"_Hanatarou! No!!" Ichigo's scream echoed in the air._

And the boy continued to fall. As sight and sound and light slowly slipped away into nothing, and all before him faded to black, he smiled unconsciously.

At least he wouldn't be a burden anymore.

_-fini-_

_Thank you for reading my fic to the very end :) I hope you were able to get some enoyment from it :)_


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